Friday, June 26, 2009

Pomp and Circumcisions

WOO HOOO! Graduation Day, faithful readers!!! I did it!!!

From Graduation Day June 2009

I finally graduated high school!!!! Yea! Me!!!

What's that, mountain man? I already graduated high school 25 frigging years ago a long, long time ago?
But I worked so hard for this day! It was me who dragged the three toed sloth's ass out of bed every morning. Me who had to ask him if he finished his homework every goddamn night through 13 years of education. And just who was it that had to run to the f**king drug store for poster board for the science project assigned three weeks earlier that had to be started, researched, and finished in a mere twelve hours? Me!
I gave up episodes of Law & Order for that sheepskin! Even missed the season finale of Deadliest Catch to help the bugger study for an economics exam, for Cripe's sake (just who is Cripe, any way?)
The nagging, the pleading, the sticking my foot so far up some one's ass he could taste the nail polish....... And now you say it ain't my day? Ya coulda told me that before I stayed up all night worrying about the next day's S.A.T.'s. (The Sloth? He slept like a baby, the s.o.b.!)
And just who is responsible for making sure that kid was not up there in his grungy jeans and tee shirt? Who made sure that suit and tie were hanging in my closet (his closet would scare the pleats out of your slacks!) three weeks before graduation?

It's not my day? But I don't wanna give up the cap and gown....Geez....if I were a man, I'd be feeling a little emasculated right now, my (imaginary) balls crawling into a warm scrotal sac.

I'll start over.
woo hoo. it's graduation day.
I he did it.

From Graduation Day june 2009

Happy? Sigh.

From Graduation Day June 2009

Look at the little heathens throwing their hats in the air. Hey, You! I paid 36 bucks for that gown AND cap, mister!!!! You march right back there and pick that up!!!!!

Thank you. Now show a brother some love!

From Graduation Day June 2009

Congrats, Kiddo! I knew I you could do it!!!!! I love you more than broccoli!

Oh, and Sloth? If it isn't too much trouble? Can I borrow that cap and gown while you're out painting the town red tonight? I'm thinking I could sneak up on the Gamester tonight while he's sleeping....You know...kinda like the Ghost of Graduation future.....

Oh, and Sloth? Ya owe me a pedicure!

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